Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer. --Henry Lawson

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. -- Frank Zappa

He was a wise man who invented beer. -- Plato

Life ain't all beer and skittles, and more's the pity. -- George DuMaurier

There can't be good living where there is not good drinking. -- Benjamin Franklin

I would give all my fame for a pot of ale and safety. --William Shakespeare, 'King Henry V.'

The government will fall that raises the price of beer. -- Czech Saying

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. --Frank Sinatra

I think this would be a good time for a beer -- FDR

Fermentation may have been a greater discovery than fire. --David Rains Wallace

Many battles have been fought and won by soldiers nourished on beer. --Frederick the Great

I recommend..bread, meat, vegetables, and beer. -- Sophocles

It is disgusting to note the increase in the quantity of coffee used by my subjects and the amount of money that goes out of the country in consequence. Everybody is using coffee. If possible, this mu

From man's sweat and God's love, beer came into the world. --Saint Arnold of Metz, The patron Saint of Brewers

You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are. -- Colonel Adolphus Busch

I am not an alcoholic. I am a drunk. We don't have to go to meetings. -- Ron the Drunken Webmaster

We're wanted men, we'll strike again, but first let's have a beer. -- Jimmy Buffett

I work until beer o'clock. --Steven King

Beer is an improvement on water itself -- Grant Johnson

Who cares how time advances? I am drinking ale today. -- Edgar Allan Poe

Everyone needs something to believe in...and I believe I'll have another beer. -- Steve Phelps

I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me. -- W.C. Fields

I'm Allergic to grass. Hey, it could be worse. I could be allergic to beer. -- Greg Norman

Here's to a long life and a merry one; A quick death and an easy one; A pretty girl and a true one; A cold beer, and another one. -- Lewis Henry

Beer glorious beer. Sing the praises of the first man to take barley and ferment the results now known as beer. Tip a cold pilsner to that unknown brewer. Give thanks to the beer god. I know not what

I never drink beer before Noon. Lucky for me, it is always after Noon somewhere. -- Ron the Drunken Webmaster

You can't drink all day...Unless you start in the morning. -- Gary Larson

Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time. - Catherine Zandonella

Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure. - Ambrose Bierce

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. - W.C. Fields

Beauty lies in the hands of the beerholder.

If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomaches. - David Daye

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. - Henny Youngman

Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life.

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy. - Tom Waits

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?

If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose. - Jack Handy

It's better to have beer in hand than gas in tank.

Life is too short to drink cheap beer.

Beer - it's not just for breakfast anymore

One more drink and I'd be under the host. - Dorothy Parker

When I heated my home with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons a year. I have found that I can keep comfortably warm for an entire winter with slightly over half that quantity of beer. - Dave Barry

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. - Dave Barry

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. - Humphrey Bogart

If nothing beats a XXXX, given the choice, I'd take the nothing...

A drink a day keeps the shrink away. - Edward Abbey

May you live as long as you want, but never want as long as you live